You are stupid. No, You are stupid.

I was thinking about what people like to call "confirmation bias" and about why it is easy for you to see my confirmation bias, but I, an otherwise rational person, am blind to it myself. It all boils down to the way we think. And that's why the religious and the non-religious can sometimes both appear stupid to the other. This was prompted by someone giving this example:

When someone says they prayed for something (let's say a job to provide for their family), and they don't get a job but they get a surprise sack of groceries on the porch. And they say that God answered their prayer because He took care of them. But then they get kicked out of their house and they say that God answered their prayer because He's blessed them with a trial, which strengthens and humbles them (more blessings) and then they get church welfare. And that's God again, answering their prayer because the Lord provides. What is this called? Is this some sort of logical fallacy?

If your fundamental mindset centers around a belief that a benevolent higher power is personally interested in your happiness, you will interpret the world and all the events of your life in that context. If you are convinced of this deep down, then you are acting with perfect rationality and good sense when you interpret events to fit into this framework.

Conversely, if you are someone who places a high value on evidence and skepticism, i.e. a non-believer, the believer's outlook seems unjustified and you will tend to view his thoughts and actions as irrational, unsupported by evidence, the result of confirmation bias, and stupid. But there, you are trying to fit him into your worldview, and the only slot he fits in is the "stupid stuff" slot.

The believer feels the same way about you. According to his worldview, it is you who are blind, irrational, and your actions shocking and unaccountable. So he is forced to place you in one of the cubbyholes provided by his worldview: you are deceived by Satan, blinded by the world, past feeling, a lost sheep, hardened in sin, etc.

I'm not saying which of these worldviews is "right" and which is "wrong" and, frankly, for the purposes of this discussion it doesn't matter. The point is that the two of you are speaking fundamentally different languages. Each of you is deceived, by the fact that you're both speaking English, into thinking that the other person understands by your words the same meaning you intended those words to convey.

But in reality, your words, which seemed sound and rational when you spoke them, got translated into gobbledygook by the other person's worldview filter, and vice versa. So you're not communicating in any real sense of the word. If you're both patient and kindhearted, you feel mostly pity for the other's delusion. If you're quick to anger, you're mostly annoyed and outraged by the other person's deliberate, intentional intransigence and obstinate refusal to understand what is perfectly clear to you and to any other "rational" person (meaning someone with the same worldview as you).

The key to this dilemma is to try to transcend your worldview and understand not only its limits, but the fact that we all fall into the trap of thinking that our worldview is actually the world. Some escape that trap and some do not. Have pity on those who do not.